black lesbian family love
She has a big family. Scratch that. She has a HUGE family. There was a lunch last weekend and when we walked in, one of her aunts was talking to her sister asking about how to say my name correctly. I hear this:
Aunt: How do you say her name again? I want to get it right.
Sis: Mina
And when we got to the tables of family, this same aunt gives Kini and me a hug. A big, strong, tight, wonderful hug. And after we set our stuff down with the family stuff, her sister says to me, “My aunt has really taken to you. And she don’t take to folks like that. Like. Not at all.”
And I smiled and proceeded to have a very very wonderful time with my lady’s family.
What I didn’t know was the fact that before Kini and I got there, evidently this same aunt cornered sis and asked her “Who here has a problem with her and her lady? Cuz we’ll have to have a talk.”
Looks like I got me some for real kinfoke.
Life has been kicking our asses. But we are back. And here is the quick and dirty for what you’ve missed:
1. We’re now less than a year away from our wedding date.
2. Our middle kid suffered from apoxia but is now almost fully recovered. No wheelchair, no walker.
3. Our baby boy is potty training.
4. We all had the plague but we’re almost 100% recovered.
5. We’re working on getting our wedding and engagement jewelry.
6. We’ve got our wedding dresses, an officiator, and some other wedding details hammered out.
7. One of us, me, Kal, is moving towards vegantaria and the other is being super uber supportive. (I’ve started a journal blog to document that journey.)
8. We started composting… even though I get grossed out easily. (I forgot that I put a spaghetti squash in the container and nearly fainted when I opened it to put more stuff in it.)
9. Both adults in the house have had birthdays and we went out of our way to make sure the birthdays were wonderful.
10. I, Kal, have been invited to join Theta Epsilon Alpha, a queer sorority.
If you’re anything like us, you’re trying to get a handle on your finances. And to be completely honest, this does not come easy for either one of us. I did happen across some valuable information for rainbow couples on this site. For starters, check out the financial models outlined below:
Marriage model
All property you acquire is jointly owned, no matter who earns the money to pay for it or who actually acquires it. You put all bank and credit accounts in both names. If you split up, the property acquired during the relationship is divided equally.
Socialist model
You open joint accounts and pay the joint bills out of joint accounts to which you have contributed according to your incomes, such as three-fourths and one-fourth.
Business partnership model
You open joint accounts for limited purposes, such as paying household expenses or saving for a vacation. It helps to have a contract specifying the percentage ownership in all property jointly accumulated.
Splitsies model
You each agree to be responsible for your own support. Like college roommates, you pay separately for food, clothes, entertainment and everything else. You have no joint accounts. This arrangement can be taken to extremes or can be worked out in a fairly easy-going, common sense, “I-paid-for-breakfast, youpay-for-lunch” way.
Get Out of Debt (http://s.tt/1gxGp)
remember that one time when there was a gay couple on a kids tv show and the only problem was that there were too many diapers to change
(Source: chiakikiki, via abrazame22)
I was raised Southern Baptist.
Essentially, the words my family, and a few of my friends, use to describe something they find religiously displeasing are a bit different. “Haraam” is a foreign word to them, but the concept is quite familiar.
I won’t get into the kind of conservatism that exists…
So… the daycare. Is pretty awesome. The first day we were asked, “Are you the parents?” We both said yes and there was no flinching or sideways glancing. And this was not a one time thing. Every time we bring him in, or pick him up, we’re both referred to interchangeably as “mom”. If we don’t both go in, one is given updates the same as if we were both standing there. It really is a joy and a pleasure both to drop him off but to pick him up because we are treated like his parents.
And the little boy with 2 moms is not treated any differently than the kids with mix-gender parents. I feel confident in saying that because when he sees his teacher, he smiles and will even run up to her. He also smiles at the other kids and other teachers.
As mothers, we know that preverbal children will communicate with you about who they like and don’t like through their behavior. So it brings light and laughter to our heart when he does things like reach for his teacher or say the word ‘stay’ when it’s time to go home. Last week, Kini was saying that she doesn’t think there’s a better place for him to be while we’re both at work. (Did I mention they’re vegetarian and serve food from the Soul Vegetarian restaurant here in Atlanta? So he’s getting all kinds of good for you, healthy foods and snacks and treats.)
And it’s great to be inspired to do better from places you don’t expect.. like.. .from your daycare. Because, it just goes to show that God is looking out for not just fools and babies.. but for their queer parents.
We don’t do the butch-femme thing. We don’t do the hetero-parody thing either. But she did ask me to marry her… and I did say yes. So now we’ve been looking for rings. She knows what she wants. And I want it all. (I love jewelry. So each time we look at rings, I fall in love with something…
…COME AT THIS HOOD!
We should prolly get some that read “I am not haraam”… what say you?
(via living-in-technicolor)





